I Am Your Sassiest Friend

Before going to the strip club this weekend I jokingly sent my friends this message.

"Let's go get chlamydia."

Responses:
"Yeah, but it'll be worth it."
"I hope you get Gonorrhea."

What I did not realize is that this message was an omen for the evening. Fast forward several hours later to when theres a stripper jamming her fingers into her cunt then into my mouth. The taste was so familiar. I knew I had chlamydia. When I woke up in the morning I pissed fire.

I went to go see my doctor in urgent care almost immediately. He prescribed some antibiotics and spared him the details of what had been in my mouth the previous evening. I get the feeling he wouldn't understand. Doctors are sooooo not sassy.

I have to take these pills twice a day for 5 days then return for a follow up.

I'll keep you guys updated on the latest until then.

Love, The Oat